ANOTHER MOM BLOGGER

I stumbled upon another blogger. I see that she has visited a few times. I welcome her to the blogging world. This blogger is not however new to adoption reform. I found something that she wrote about quite appalling. I have been told by an adoption professional that female adoptees are more likely than the non adopted females to place their child up for adoption.

So Adoption Truth wrote this on her blog about a booklet put out by the Family Research Council. It is called “The Missing Piece: Adoption Counseling in Pregnancy Resource Centers.” The Family Research Council and the National Council for Adoption (Both are axis of evil) teamed up with the Right Brain People and Curtis Young to write this little novel piece of work. Many in the adoption underground movement know about this. A dear friend advised a long time ago that both of these organizations want to continue the Anonymous gift giving by going after adoptees. I didn’t think it was true. Until I read this:

As important as INFLUENCING adults is on this matter, INFLUENCING CHILDREN must be the HIGHEST PRIORITY. First impressions of adoption tend to last a lifetime. To be effective, any public-relations effort must encompass programming and media that are CHILD-FRIENDLY. A CONSISTENT, NATIONAL MESSAGE directed toward the next generatio“n could help PERMANENTLY CHANGE the value this culture places on adoption.” –

So they want us adoptees to feel good about adoption so that we give up our children to adoption. UUUUgh, no you are not getting my children ever. I will remove all of my ovaries and uterus in order to prevent that. I will make sure that my children, my grandchildren and the rest of my family never has a good view of adoption.

The author of this little masterpiece was a Curtis Young. No not the country music icon. The Bastardette enlightened me further with this little tidbit about him.

Mr. Young, a Presbyterian minister and former executive director of CareNet, a national franchise of “crisis pregnancy centers,” is the author of The Missing Piece a 2001 Family Research Council “study” on the use of “the adoption option” in CPC counseling. Young argues that adoption has gotten such a bad rap from the media (and made-for-TV movies) that women just don’t see it as an desirable option to a problematic pregnancy AKA: in my family we don’t give away our own flesh and blood. Heck, even CPC counselors see adoption as “baby abandonment” and a “big lie.”

Evidently most of the member agencies of the National Council For Adoption use this little pamphlet along with the Birthmother Good mother slop. I found an article on a LDS magazine website. It just sickened me. What many of those poor mothers and fathers go through with this group of agencies boggles this ranting forever child’s mind.

Here are a few paragraphs that Ms. Rebecca M. Taylor from the Ensign Magazine wrote:

While Church members lag behind much of the rest of the world in the single-parent trend, more and more Latter-day Saint unwed mothers are choosing to become single parents. Yet the official position of the First Presidency remains consistent: when a successful marriage is not likely, unwed parents are encouraged to place their babies for adoption into a loving, two-parent, Latter-day Saint home (see sidebar).

Why does the Church support adoption?”

A popular modern catchphrase is “A family can be anything as long as there is love.” Yet the proclamation on the family declares, “Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity.”2 Numerous studies have shown that children are better off when raised by both a mother and a father. These children are less likely to drop out of school, have behavioral problems, participate in delinquent behavior, become single mothers themselves, and live in poverty.3

In her book For the Love of a Child, social worker Monica L. Blume points out, “Almost every birth mother I have ever seen who is choosing to single parent believes she will be one of the very few who beat the odds.”4 Many of these unwed mothers count on the father remaining fully involved or on having their own father help raise the child. And many Latter-day Saint single mothers hope to eventually get married and become sealed to their child in the temple.

Unfortunately, such hopes are not often realized. And many unwed mothers find that single parenthood is much more challenging than they expected. Studies have shown that single mothers have higher rates of illness, have less social involvement, and, if they are teenagers, are less likely to eventually marry than those who place their babies for adoption.5

But as Tammy Squires with LDS Family Services says, none of her clients wants to be labeled a “statistic.” These mothers feel great love toward their babies and may believe that others cannot offer the same love and care a biological parent can provide. “I try to help them see that it’s not about biology; it’s about stability and what is best for the baby,” Sister Squires explains. “Their decision will affect their child not only throughout this life but in eternity. They need to pray about it and feel peaceful about their decision, whatever that final decision may be.”

One of the most powerful factors that influence an unwed expectant mother’s decision regarding her baby is the opinion of her parents. It can be heart-wrenching for grandparents to consider relinquishing an infant grandchild. Like their daughter, grandparents often bond with the baby even before birth, and they have hopes and dreams for the baby’s future.

Many parents feel a grave sense of responsibility when their child becomes pregnant out of wedlock. They may feel that the most moral decision is to support their child in raising the baby rather than releasing the baby to the care of others. Church teachings about self-reliance and using family resources may seem to reinforce this belief. However, the First Presidency has addressed these concerns.

Not only does the choice to be a single parent leave the child bereft of the sealing ordinance, but its outcome can be confusing when the child is raised by extended family members. Shanna Bake of LDS Family Services explains that these children “often don’t know who to call mom. Who do they listen to? Who do they go to first when they have a problem? What about discipline? It’s undefined.”

Some may view placing a child for adoption as “abandoning” that child. But, as Sister Bake emphasizes, adoption “is not abandoning your responsibility. It’s taking more responsibility. It is truly taking care of your own, because you’re saying, ‘I can’t give this child what he or she needs, but someone else can.’ ”

One writer expressed it this way: adoption is “not the abandonment of a baby but an abandonment of self for a baby’s sake.”7

First Presidency Statement on Adoption

“We … express our support of unwed parents who place their children for adoption in stable homes with a mother and a father. We also express our support of the married mothers and fathers who adopt these children.

“Children are entitled to the blessing of being reared in a stable family environment where father and mother honor marital vows. Having a secure, nurturing, and consistent relationship with both a father and a mother is essential to a child’s well-being. When choosing adoption, unwed parents grant their children this most important blessing. Adoption is an unselfish, loving decision that blesses the child, birth parents, and adoptive parents in this life and throughout the eternities. We commend all those who strengthen children and families by promoting adoption.”

First Presidency statement, Oct. 4, 2006

After reading Birthmother, Goodmother, I am further sickened. They actually preach that the birthmother is redeemed by her actions.

They somewhat address the mothers of the past (BSE) felt coerced. They stated however that they make sure that the mothers of today do not feel that way.

Explain to me why we are having more and more cases of mothers and fathers fighting for their right to parent their own child. Explain to me why Camira Bailey was threatened by LDS Family Services in the hospital with the help of the Nursing staff no less with CPS action if she didn’t relinquish.

With many of the international adoption countries shutting their doors to Americans, desperate American prospective adoptive parents are turning to adoption agencies. Sadly there are just too many agencies that are willing to accommodate them because the agencies want that money. LDS Family/Social Services has numerous adoptions being contested. Poor Larry Jenkins must be spread pretty thin. Last I heard he was defending LDS and their umbrella of agencies against four maybe five sets of parents. That is not including all of the other parents that are fighting this group. Then you have A Child’s Waiting who has fourty five complaints against them. They are in for the battle of their lives with their license. Ohio is pretty intent on shutting them down. They don’t care about the adoptees, the natural parents nor the adoptive parents. They just want the money.

Its up to us to do something about it. Will it be done? All the adoptees and natural parents can scream and hollar but the federal government won’t listen. They will listen to adoptive parents only because of money.

Then you have websites that keep records of mothers who change their minds. They are prepared to give all the information over to law enforcement. Just another way to shut us all up. Personally I am sick of it. I want it to end now. I am screaming for a federal investigation into adoption practices without the COA, JCICS, and the NCFA butting in.

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2 Responses to “ANOTHER MOM BLOGGER”

  1. suz Says:

    When I Lived in the maternity faicility in Chicago, nearly half of the expectant moms there were adoptees themselves. It startled me then and does not too.

  2. Cassi Says:

    The elaborate detail you added to this is amazing and so telling. I hope it will go far in letting others know the truth that is out there.
    I do visit your blog often as I find it a great source of information and enlightment. You do an unbelievable job in standing up and speaking out and I respect your courage and strength in the world of adoption reform.

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