Archive for September, 2007

A HORSE OF STEEL AND OTHER SUCH NOTABLE MENTIONS

September 29, 2007

Wild dreams started my day. I remember hearing these words. All adoptees and natural mothers want from our society is to validate our experiences. We need validation from our families. So this is how I started my day.

I took my kids to school as always. I filled up my gas tank and head to Vernon, Texas. I don’t visit Vernon all that much even though the office of the W.T. Waggoner are headquartered there. There is this fabulous taco/burrito place. Very hole in the wallish. Its called Taquieria Jalisco. I treated myself to an awesome burrito. It was a steak/bean/sour cream/ cheese/ cilantro and onions. I didn’t care that it was 8:30 am.

I decided to visit my dearest friend, Sarahrae. She is the most vibrant, strong, funny, beautiful red headed woman. I hadn’t seen her in a month or two. Last time was right before my return to work. Sadly I learned her father past away. He fought for seven years to gain custody of her. Its a long story and when she is ready I will tell the story here. Her father decided to donate his organs. She received a letter from the company along with a green ribbon pin. Interestingly enough, a green ribbon represents organ donation but also adoptee rights. Somewhere in there is a snarky comment but I can’t even begin to imagine the words to say. In a moment of silence, please dear Lord welcome a very giving loving father into your arms.

I come home after grocery shopping to take my hubby to his appointment. I hear about his day. His day surrounds the horse of steel, Gino. There is this one cow that all the cowboys have learned to keep an eye. Well, she was in the pens. She set her sights on Gino and my hubby. She charged after them a couple of times. Then came her turn to be moved into the alley. Well she was having none of it. She stood in the alley and wouldn’t budge. She bobbed her head a few times. As Gino and hubby come trotting down the alley, she charges head first into Gino’s chest. Gino is a 13 year old grey horse. He stood there and watched. He must have bowed his chest just as she hit his chest. The wench stopped and fell sideways. After a moment of kicking, she died. The evil cow broke her neck on his chest. Now this is a story that no one would ever believe unless they saw it. Only in a million years and only my husband and our horses. All of the cowboys sat there in stunned hysteria. All of them laughing so hard. Never in a million years did we ever think we had a horse of steel. Gino is probably a little bruised but he is fine. The cow is well off to chase angelic cowboys and their horses in the afterlife. After the saddle was removed, he went down to the tank to cover himself in red mud. His dream to become a sorrel colored horse.

Our notable mentions. Of course, Ms. Jenna is mentioned in one of her state’s newspapers. Another poetic writer and fellow blogger, Jane Jeong Trenka, was in this newspaper. So check these out. Kudos for making adoption real.

Advertisements

RODNEY ATKINS

September 27, 2007

This came upon my radar earlier today. I can’t believe it either. This guy was one of my favorites. His music got to me. Now he is the NCFA’s Celebrity spokesperson.

Found this on the CMT website.

Rodney Atkins has been named the national celebrity spokesperson for the National Council for Adoption (NCFA), an advocacy organization. Atkins will share his story of being adopted and will perform a lunchtime set at the All National Parent Recruitment Summit on Oct. 3 in Washington D.C. “These children are the future of our nation and our families. It is important that we make sure they are taken care of,” Adkins says

DARRYL MCDANIEL ~ RUN DMC ~ YOU TOTALLY ROCK MY WORLD

September 26, 2007

Has anyone read this? This man takes a brave step. He documents his own search. He makes a documentary about it. THIS MAN TOOK A FRIGGIN’ EMMY FOR IT. SUPER KUDOS FOR THIS MAN.

You can read the story here. Check out his coooooool pic.

WHO IS MORE WORTHY?

September 25, 2007

This has been swirling in my mind. I have even asked my husband questions on how he views his own sexuality and the resulting body functions. Our society has mixed views on sexuality. Its contradictory in its treatment of men and women. To fully understand adoption, one does have to look at human sexuality. We live in a patriarchy. It stems from the Bible. Because of abortion, we have had to look at when conception begins thus finding out when humanity begins. After reading the Georgia Tann biography, our society has long treated children as property. The children in her home as well as many others were treated horribly. Just look at the Orphan Trains in those times. Children were taken in homes to work hard labor.

Because I live on a huge ranch in Texas and I have spent my last eleven years on a ranch, I watched animal life. From horses, cattle, goats, sheep, cats and dogs, I have watched it all. This includes deer, hogs, javelina, and other forms of wild life. I hear stories of my husband in his prowling adventures on horseback. Just down the hill from us, he came across a bobcat and her kitten. She was teaching her kitten how to defend himself against wildlife. I have watched a mother badger cross the road with her babies. They were nearly as big as her. We stopped our old Ford truck to watch them do this. Only in humanity do we take babies from their mothers at birth.

When we moved in this house nearly three years ago, we brought our dogs over first to get them acclimated to their new environment. We knew there was a few cats still here. Feral of course. What we didn’t know is that a mama cat had her kittens under the house. The mama cat was a very beautiful long haired black cat. She was impossible to catch. Later we heard mewing under the house. My oldest daughter, brave even then, was the only one who could reach her babies. Mama cat didn’t feel safe coming into the yard let alone coming up to us. She vanished shortly after we brought the kittens into our home. We nursed her babies until they were fit enough to go outside on their own.

The only time anyone gets a calf on the ranch is only when the mother has died or had to be put down. My husband let a blind cow hang around her calf until the calf was old enough to fend for itself. Its just something that you don’t mess with. All the mares on this ranch are artificially bred from what I hear. We are not allowed onto that part of the ranch because its considered proprietary information. I see the mares raising their colts and fillies out in a pasture on their own. They birth them on their own in a pasture on their own. These colts and fillies are not taken off their mamas until they are 9 months old. Its awesome to watch these relationships form and grow.

I try to relate these natural views to my own life. Granted daily I am reminded that I don’t know my heritage, the life I lead though does bring me down to nature. The world I live in respects nature in its total awesome and sometimes cruel beauty.

Then I come back to humanity and its cruelty towards itself. Sometimes its very hard for me to reconcile that we are human beings doing this kind of harm to other human beings. I have long asked my husband and my male friends why is it that semen is less than a woman’s ovum. Women through biblical times until now are expected to live up to excruciating standards. Men on the other hand are allowed to live freely without condemnation and humiliation. They are not held to the same accountability as women. When they do live up to that like in Cody O’Dea, Rashad Head, Brynden Ayre, and Joseph Simmerson, their rights are violated. Then other men leave their girlfriends and wives behind when they get pregnant. They want to enjoy the rights and priviledges but want none of the responsibility of being a true man. I have been truly blessed with many of the men in my life. They have all owned up to their responsibility.

When women as a whole get sick of it all, they take matters into their own hands. They use IVF. Before I met my husband, I thought of this myself. So I can’t condemn a woman for going this route. Yes we have more fun doing it the old fashion way but what happens when men don’t want a committment and run at the earliest sign of it. Men aren’t the only ones that do this though either. Just look at the previously mentioned cases to see proof of that.

Rape cases are another thing that comes to mind when deciding who is more worthy. You have two women, one dressed sexy and the other dressed classy. Both get raped. Who is more worthy? Who is more believable? Was there any violence involved? Is the woman dressed classy more believable? What about the woman who was dressed sexy? Did she ask for it? What if the woman who was dressed classy had a reputation? Is it rape if one of the women were so drunk or high that they passed out? Are either one of these women more worthy and why do you think that?

Are women even allowed to enjoy sex even in this day? How can a mother adequately teach her daughters about their own bodies without filling them with some shame? Why aren’t sons being taught these same things? Why is it a battle?

After reading most of Rickie Solinger’s book, Wake Up Little Suzie, white women were considered mentally ill up until the seventies for being pregnant. They were often characterized as willing themselves pregnant. Even it is not said in the book, these women were considered breeders thanks to likes of Georgia Tann. Even the author of her recent biography touches on this. Being poor was also a sin. African American women were verbally and vocally called breeders. In those days, there were calls for sterilization of these women. Interestingly enough, African American women were also very in touch with their families. Many a grandmother were often overheard as saying that was my grandbaby. That baby belongs in our family. I have read in even recent studies that maybe ethnic groups should be taught more about contraception and even abortion. Adoption is still predominately a white phenomen. Its been suggested that women be forced to bring their children into this world even if they had no choice in the act that created it>

In the adoption industry itself, they are fighting for what they believe to be a fundamental right to adopt children. It makes me wonder now if the right to adopt is more powerful right than the right to parent one’s children. I wonder if we are setting ourselves up for failure. Is the right to adopt going to become more powerful than a woman’s right to her own reproductive choices? I have heard repetitively from prospective adoptive parents and adoptive parents that if women would only consider adoption. With mental health initiatives taking many forms, are we as a society going to decide who can be mothers and who can’t? With the industry feeding negative views of single mothers into our leaders’ brains, are we really a society of family preservation? Are we really interested in families period? If our societal leaders decide a woman can’t parent her own child, will they force her into a court ordered protective custody thus taking her child from her at birth? What about fathers’ rights here? Because the couple had consensual sex before marriage, will this be mental health issue and will both parties be forced to put their children up for adoption? Forgoing any permission or consent from her and him all together? Does adoption make female adoptees more likely suspects in the eyes of our societal leaders? What about male adoptees? Even American soldiers are now being targeted. Yes adoption concerns me. Yes I feel it should be on the fore front of the national womens’ organizations. When did America become so entitled to even others’ children? I thought it might be just adoptive parents but it is the industry itself that is creating hardships on American women and children by pushing their agenda onto women, men and children through our own state legislatures. They also suck in the pro-life movements. They also force pro-choice movements into defining even further thus cutting their own ropes short and tight. Adoption is very much a women’s issue. If adoption is so great, really what child are you willing to give up? Bet you aren’t so keen on it now.

I have also come across another situation. I find that this hostile environment scary for my own natural mother to come out in. I don’t want her hurt anymore. She has enough to face with me. Even though many feel that I am due an apology, I don’t want one. Because I do truly understand what happened with her. I don’t want her to die without telling her sons, my brothers, the truth. They deserve to hear it from her with me standing beside her backing her up. I believe that my natural mother was truly in love. I believe that my own natural father did what he felt was best for all involved. He stood up when many men from that era ran. I could never condemn either parent. I can’t even condemn my own adoptive mother. She did her best with me. She never once lied to me about my truth. She too stands beside me in this fight. She too wishes for mothers to keep their children. She knows all too well how close we all are as mothers to losing our children at times in life. She believes in my fight even though she sometimes wishes that she too could go back into the fog. Alas we can’t can we?

DEMONS IN ADOPTION

September 22, 2007

On october 4th the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute will hold their annual Angels in Adoption gala, where several people will be honored with the Angels in Adoption Reward.

To raise a voice against adoption propaganda and this self congratulatory practive, Pound Pup Legacy is proud to introduce the first edition of the annual Demons of Adoption Awards.
This years nominees are:

Adoption.com, for systematically banning voices that oppose current adoption practices

Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute for awarding persons and organizations that promote the one sided point of view of the adoption industry.

Council on Accreditation for having fierce adoption lobbyists in their board of trustees, making the accreditation process a dubious conflict of interest affair.

National Council for Adoption for pushing the adoption agenda in pregnancy consultation.

National Safe Haven Alliance for promoting legislation that promotes child abandonment.

NYC Administration for Children’s Services for not checking up on Judith Leekin.

By voting You can help decide who will receive this award.

go here to vote: http://poundpuplegacy.org/node/7874

ADOPTEE RIGHTS PROTEST IN NEW ORLEANS

September 22, 2007

The date of the Adoptee Rights Protest is:

TUESDAY JULY 22ND 2008

LAYFETTE PARKNEW ORLEANS, LA

Please pass this on!
To join up for the protest go to http://www.adopteerights.net and register on our free form so that an accurate head count can be made.

Thank you,The Adoptee Rights Protest Committee

I am going to be there. Are you?

ADOPTION IN THE NEWS

September 20, 2007

This story has been on everyone’s mind the last few days. It was my understanding that privacy would be the last excuse to overturn this law. Its a shame that a judge would actually listen to three adoptees and the one natural mom who were opposed to this law.

Then I read a story about a young girl in Bowie Texas giving birth and throwing a baby in a trash bag. Did the safe haven laws protect her? No!!! What our society fails to get is that we are still treating women and young girls horribly. We are failing them miserably. We are continuing to shame them into hiding their pregnancies. They’re families are the ones to blame for these situations. When a young girl does this to a child, I have to wonder what her family and friends have said to her to make her take these actions. The safe haven laws sure as hell didn’t work in this case.

Another story is circulating out of Haltom City, Texas. This mother burned her three daughters in a closet. The girls were reported as asking”why Mommy did you hurt us?” Its not being reported that Texas has the highest rate of mothers hurting their children. This kind of attitude is hurting other mothers who are properly raising their children. It won’t be long before Texas mothers will be required to be mental health tested in order to continue having children. When are we going to look at our society and make changes? When are we truly going to be about families, true family preservation?

Now I know everyone by now has heard about the Australian lesbian mother who only wanted one child not twins. All I can think is that we have flipping lost our minds. What is this truly about? We go from one extreme in this world to another.

ADOPTION IN THE NEWS

September 18, 2007

http://english.hani.co.kr/arti/english_edition/e_opinion/237090.html is about Korean adoptees.

http://www.cbc.ca/canada/ottawa/story/2007/09/17/ont-adoption.html is about Canada’s new laws

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/09/16/nadopt116.xml is about the continuing castrophe of forced adoption in the UK

http://thechronicleherald.ca/Front/874399.html is about birth certificates with a gay couple’s name on the birth certificate. How about this ~ lets end amended birth certificates totally. Lets put the names of all on the birth certificate. It ends the complicated issue all together. Will they listen? NO

http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/music/la-et-vedder18sep18,1,866079.story?coll=la-entnews-music Mr. Vedder is a very cool adoptee.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/men/article2293863.ece is about sperm donation.

Adoptive parents caught abusing their children. http://www.ohio.com/news/ap?articleID=99001&c=y

http://www.djournal.com/pages/story.asp?ID=251869&pub=1&div=News isn’t this comparing apples to oranges

http://www.alternet.org/rights/60289/ is an article that I find puzzling. After reading what they say if the adopted child is taken away from their parents, but isn’t this what they do to natural parents. Very confounding

DAY OF REORGANIZATION

September 17, 2007

I have been thinking about doing this for quite a long time. Its time for me to change things up. This weekend was just the kicker that made it mandatory for me.

I was off work Friday. I was going to help a friend of mine with taking pictures of her family’s grave plot and their old family house in Electra. That was a great deal of fun. I couldn’t find the graves because they were unmarked. I went up and down on both sides of the cemetary. I did have the address for the house though. The house looked ancient and about ready to fall apart with one touch of a finger. The house was overgrown with trees, shrubs and vines. The mailbox was old and rusted. The house was not even liveable. I did go to the Electra library and found the articles for both her great grandmother and her grandfather. The names changed to protect the innocent. I then went to Wichita Falls library and found the article for her grandfather. I have mailed then since then. She should receive them on Wednesday. It was a truly wonderful moment in my day.

My day took a turn for the worst. A dear friend plead guilty on charges of international kidnapping. This was a story of coercion and lying. Sad thing is that I can’t do a damn thing about it. Her story is one of donor semen and egg that went tragically wrong. Even if you don’t agree with the IVF stuff, how can anyone turn their back on someone who could use advice and help? Because she used IVF, does she deserve to be treated the way that she was? I honestly don’t understand. Sadly, every natural mother secretly wishes that they too could have run off with their children. I know many. Even if this same mother said some things that were done in the heat and emotion of the moment, can you really blame her? She lost her children, for Christ’s sake. She made foolish choices but we do we as mothers and children, not made them?

Even though I do believe in family preservation, I just can’t do this anymore. Its killing me bit by bit. Even though I do believe the adoption industry is out of control and corrupted, I just can’t do this anymore. This is the third morning a row where I have felt nauseated and sick. I desparately need a break. So I am going to slow down and step back. I need to find that spot where I don’t take on other people’s problems and carry them as my own. For now I need to fight my battle against adoption in another way. All this shit with entitled adoptive parents is killing me step by step. Sadly down the road, I will meet Tyler and Hollie within my own organizations. They will be joining Bastard Nation and AAFC. I will be saddened because I know their story. It could have all been prevented.

SNICKERING AND SNORTING

September 17, 2007

JOLIE, PITT RETURN ADOPTED CHILDREN
Hollywood — As the trend for adopting third-world children wanes, superstar couple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have decided to return their three adopted children to their respective countries.“Just like Kababalah, Ugg boots, and trucker hats, all trends come to an end in Hollywood, and it seems Brad and Angelina simply grew tired of those kids,” said Celebritytrend.com writer Stephen Henderson.
According to insiders, all four children cried hysterically and begged their parents to stay as they were told the heartbreaking news and sent back to their native countries.
“Having their assistants put these kids on flights at LAX airport all by themselves was a bit harsh,” said TMZ.com supervising producer Gillian Sheldon. “But what makes this situation even worse is that those poor kids had to fly commercial. After all the months they had to get used to living in luxury, it’s sickening.”
Five year-old Maddox is already back in Cambodia and in custody of the government.
“We knew Maddox would be back soon,” said Cambodian Interior Minister Naruth Bopha. “I mean, we all knew that Angelina couldn’t make a long commitment. How long did her marriage with Billy Bob Thorton last? How long before her sexual relationship with her brother came to an end? I actually won 300,000 dong ($20) in the office pool.”
Cambodian officials don’t know what will happen to Maddox, but they hope Madonna will adopt him. Officials have contacted Madonna’s publicity team but have not heard back from the singer as rumors are swirling that Madonna is preparing to return her adopted child, David Banda, back to the African nation of Malawi.
“Unfortunately there’s nothing we can do about Angelina and Brad or Madonna returning their children,” said Dalton. “The return policy clearly states they can bring the children back at any time. The laws are different there when it comes to adoption. So long as you keep the receipt, you can do pretty much anything.”
Pitt and Jolie’s adopted three year old child, Pax Thien, was sent back to Vietnam. A photo of Pax is now up on eBay with some bids over $5,000.
“I’m watching this auction every minute of the day,” said eBay shopper Dennis Gartone. “It would be awesome to show off Pax and say, ‘Check it out. This was Angelina and Brad’s kid.’”
Two year old Zahara Marley was sent back to Ethiopia and was lost for last several days after arriving in the African nation. She has since been located and is being cared by a United Nations official, Timothy Charles.
“Woody Allen contacted me, but said he’d only be interesting in adopting her when she turns 16,” said Charles.
As for Pitt and Jolie’s biological child, 15-month-old Shiloh Nouvel, the celebrity couple are thinking about putting her up for adoption because of their demanding schedules. According to sources, Jennifer Aniston is interested in adopting her.