Archive for April, 2007

GLADNEY PROTEST POSTPONED

April 29, 2007

At this time, the protest against Gladney has been stopped. The reason being is the current SB 221. I am sad to say that TXCare has sold Texas adoptees and their families down the road. They want to pass this bill so bad. It does not matter that it is prospective only. It allows for adoptees to still attempt to get their original birth certificates IF and only IF their first parents have signed a contact preference form.

The bill can be viewed at:

http://www.legis.state.tx.us/tlodocs/80R/analysis/html/SB00221S.HTM

Why does Gladney feel the need to regulate a right that every non adopted individual has in this country? Why do they feel the need to demean and belittle adoptees and their families? They view us as property and product that they own. They don’t want our parents telling the truth to us because we would be even angrier than we already are.

Shame on TXCare for selling our rights away. Don’t you realize that if this bill passes that we will never be able to change. I say we kill this bill. We pull it while we have control. Why do we always have to sacrifice to the money machines that gobble our lives, our identity and our truth?

PULL SB 221. ITS A SHAM AGAINST ADOPTEES, FIRST PARENTS AND THEIR FAMILIES!

ANOTHER DAY OF ADOPTION NEWS

April 25, 2007

Another challenging day of reading quickly, writing quickly, living life very quickly and more. Here are some more interesting news articles. We are encompassing the news again folks. We need to start beating our drums.

http://www.countercurrents.org/riben250407.htm

Ms Riben discusses adoption as big business. Very interesting read.

http://www.newsobserver.com/105/story/567097.html

It is back and forth in North Carolina. Excellent story on mothers.

http://www.sltrib.com/ci_5727652

This is a story about international adoptees

http://www.postbulletin.com/newsmanager/templates/localnews_story.asp?a=290358&z=2

Adoption agencies are always a favorite topic of mine. Oh what do I see!! This agency is also associated with A Child’s Waiting. The criminal adoption agency in Stephanie Bennett’s case.

http://www.ecanadanow.com/entertainment/2007/04/23/madonna-left-malawi-without-letter-her-son-see-his-birth-father/

What a bitch. That is all I can say about Madonna. She is doing nothing but hurting her son. It will bite her in the ass.

ADOPTION ROADKILL

April 24, 2007

Looky and read. She is really good. I love that she nails good and hard.

http://adoptionroadkill.blogspot.com/.

If you don’t believe that coercion existed, read her. She will tell ya and she will tell ya good.

A FEW INTERESTING NEWS READS.

April 24, 2007

I really don’t want to put up any news stories. I just have to though. It is important that the world sees how America treats its adoptees.

It is also important for me to make sure that those that can support Bill Betzen and those radicals for adoptee access in the protest of Gladney Adoption Center continue to do so. I support this protest 100%. Texans need to know that this agency is just as corrupt as the many others that support sealed records. This agency supports its own financial gain and only its financial gain. It does not support first parents right one little damn bit. It supports keeping its own secrets. They don’t want society to know that they think adopted children are product, first parents are producers, and adoptive parents the gullible consumer.

Onto the news stories about adoption.

http://www.vindy.com/content/local_regional/288720658184981.php

This one is about maternity homes and their resurgeance in American society. Oh no they don’t want to take your children but if you can’t pay your bills, we will take your child. Maternity homes should forever be banished. They tear down and destroy women and their children. They rob adoptive parents.

http://www.thetimesnews.com/onset?id=1035&template=article.html

Mr. Lee Allen would have you believe that those precious birth mothers are in dire need to be protected from their wayward bastards. Shame on those children for wanting their truth. Its not theirs to have. Mr. Allen, its time that the NCFA start looking at the statistics. Sorry we won’t shut up anymore. Nor will our mommies.

http://nwitimes.com/articles/2007/04/23/news/lake_county/doce3300104f06768e7862572c60003b899.txt

Looking for cost effective ways to shop for that elusive baby. Here it is. Epidemic of unwanted pregnancy, my happy little adoptee ass. Women are keeping their children. They are slowly learning that they don’t want to be apart of an industry that destroys one family in order to create another.

http://www.clickondetroit.com/family/12922140/detail.html

Young couple hopes to adopt via MYSPACE. Their address in case you are tempted either to throw rocks are, wish them well or even barf on them. Here it is http://www.myspace.com/10537370.

All of this for your reading enjoyment and puking celebration. Love gang.

DEAR STATE LEGISLATOR (TEXAS)

April 23, 2007

My name is Amy Burt. I live on the W. T. Waggoner estate, south of Vernon, Texas. I am also an adoptee. I am asking you to change the laws concerning adoptee access to their own records. As I look over my part of the Waggoner Ranch, I am consistently reminded of what I do not have. The owners of this ranch have the medical history and ancestral lineage of every livestock, horses and cattle, on this ranch. This helps them prevent and correct malformation, diseases, and even death in these animals. These people would not have the profitable ranch without this key information.

I also visited my sister over the weekend. Our father died about five years ago. We were going over pictures and other memories. I was utterly amazed to see his influence in both her and her children. I am saddened again because I do not have the information for myself or my children. I can not see the influence of both of my birth parents in me or my children.

With the Surgeon General of the United States putting out the importance of medical history every November and with the tightening of rules for the State Department in gaining a passport, it is time for adoptees and their extended families to have access to the same information that every non-adopted person has in the United States. By keeping the records sealed, you have sentanced me and millions of others like me to a priori. You have sentanced all living adoption for crimes that we have not even committed.

Allowing adoption agencies, adoption attorneys, and their lobbyists to control your thinking about our lives is like allowing the wolf to guard the hen house. Adoption agencies make money off the birth parents ( They have to pay their own expenses during their pregnancy. This might include a stay at a maternity home that costs $3,000 per month.), off the adoptive parents ( The average cost of an adoption is $30,000) and the adoptee ( If the adoptee decides to search, the cost is $1,000 and up. Many times adoptees are nickled and dimes until completely out of money and still have nothing to show for that money).

Gladney Adoption Center, LDS, Bethany Adoption Services, and the National Council for Adoption would have you believe that birth parents will be forever damaged by their children lost to adoption. They would have you believe that they were promised forever confidentiality. If that were the case, where is the documentation proving it? There is none. There was never the promise of confidentiality. Two court cases deciding this were in Oregon and Tennessee. Both agreed that women did not have the fundamental right to give their children up for adoption; therefore, they do not have the fundamental right to the forever confidentiality. They also state that adoptee access did not impede familial privacy. In parenting, contraception, and even abortion, women are exercising their right to privacy. In adoption, women are relinquishing their rights. They are forfeiting their right to privacy.

With all this being said, birth parents are not even allowed access to the adoptee’s original birth certificate yet Gladney is worried about their privacy. In states that have allowed adoptee access, the statistical information is overwhelming. 99% of birth parents want contact with their children. .4% want contact via a confidential intermediary. Yes that is point four percent. When the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute did a research study on birth mothers, their statistics were at 90%. If you think about this information, it makes logical sense. As a parent, would you want to be cut off from your child? No you would not.

The other major excuse for sealed records is increase in abortion. Texas and New York have the highest rates for abortion. Both states are closed states. In Oregon, abortion rates are falling and adoption rates are INCREASING. Shock did I say that right? Yes I did. In Kansas and Alaska, both states have had the lowest abortion rates and the highest adoption rates. They have both always been adoptee access states.

With these kind of statistics, I guess that blows the theories of Gladney Adoption Center, LDS, Bethany Social Services, and the National Council for Adoption out of the water. I will provide a list of links that will take a few short minutes of your time to review. You will see that I and the many many others who support adoptee access laws are correct. You will also see the very dark side of adoption.

Here is a few questions for you to ponder. One blogger friend once said, “If adoption is so great, which child are you willing to give up?” I bet none. Would you like to be held to a forever contract which was made about you in your best interests? No. Do the non adopted have to pay someone money to contact their parents when they wish to speak with them? NO. Do the non adopted have to get permission from their parents to see the document that accurately records their birth? NO. You expect adoptees to do all of this. Are you going to allow the Shawn McDonald Cases to continue? Are you willing to allow the Stephanie Bennett Cases to continue? Are you willing to tell Rashad Head that he can’t get his son back because an adoption agency was unscrupulous? Are you willing to let more situations like Allison Quets to continue? Make adoption agencies be subject to the light of truth. If you want to reduce abortion, vote to allow adoptees access to their own records.

Sincerely,
Amy K. Burt

A NEW FORUM FOR ADOPTEES AND A BLOGGER

April 22, 2007

http://goingbacktosquareone.blogspot.com/2007/04/love-thursday.html.
You really need to read this. I can’t tell if it is a pity party or what. I tried to comment to get my explanation off to this person but she has it blocked. Oh well. I will just post my comment here for her to read.

Yes I am an adoptee. Yes I am angry. I am angry at the system more than any individual. The adoption industry is just that an industry but they have way too much power and control over our lives. They tell us what terminology to use. They tell us all what records we are allowed to see or not see. They tell us that they know what is best for us. So yea I hate my control taken from me. Adoptive parents do take a little of that from us.

She said please don’t julienne all of us adoptive parents. Okay first and foremost, it is not my job to make you or any other adoptive parent feel good about themselves. It is not my job to constantly reassure you. You have to find that within yourself especially if you are adopting. Your child is going to have enough complexes to deal with because of the industry itself and societal views of adoptees. Keep in mind they view us as crazy for wanting our truth. They treat us like diseases to our first parents and ungrateful brats to our adoptive parents. They will treat your child this same way until people like me and many many others change things. Of course you could help with this by changing your own proprietal view of your child.

I finally got around to reading about adoptees in general. Its time ya know. I have been reading all about mothers and their experiences. I have neglected to take care of myself. Its a symptom of being adopted. So I began with one book. Journey of the Adopted Self by Betty Jean Lifton. I had to join a paperback book club to even get a copy. I don’t want to pay an arm and leg for a book. I am a broke woman with two kids, a cowboy husband, six cats, five dogs, a road runner or two, a household, and a part time voluntary job as an adoptee rights activist. Yep my life is pretty busy. Its like HOLY SHIT this is me. HOLY SHIT ~ I did this stuff when I was younger. My own adoptive mother puzzled over it too. HOLY SHIT!!!!! I am not even done with the book. Just barely half way through it.

We as adoptees are second class citizens within our own adoptive families. I don’t want to hear it. Yea Yea you love us the same. No you don’t. Accept it. We are different. We have been denied our nature. We must live your version of the truth even if it goes against our very grain. Adoptees are not born to you. So don’t even say as if to me. We are not. The adoption industry tells you to ignore what has gone on before we arrived in your family. That is not important. We adoptees come to you as clean slates.. Guess what that just isn’t the case. Just as I am part of you. I am very much a part of her. Her nature is my nature.

In Chapter nine of Journey To The Adopted Self, the very first few paragraphs got me. Its me my entire life. I don’t even think my family even realizes it.

“Teresa, an adopted woman in her mid-forties, writes that she finally has a satisfying marriage and career, but the adoption questions still “haunt” her. While her adoptive mother was dying, a friend of the family remarked that as adopted daughters, she and her sister could not be trusted to make good decisions about the care of her mother. “Does this never go away? Will no stage of my life be free of the questions and doubts and subtle accusations by others that I am not a worthy, full adult?” she asks. “Will I ever feel like a whole person? Will I ever be able to know that the good things that come my way reflect who I really am?”

My entire family has treated me this way. Its like WOW someone who understands how I feel about adoption. I have been treated like I can’t make good decisions, choices. I can’t think on my own. It drives me totally insane. I can think of many many times where my choices were distrusted but someone else outside the family had the trust of my family more than I did. It still continues to boggle my mind. Even in my own search, my decisions, my research, my feelings, my ideas were distrusted.

So I ask the blogger when will you see that your child is so much more than what the adoption industry tells you? Are you ever going to realize your child’s true nature? When are you going to realize that its not your child’s job to make sure that you are reassured and secure in that your child is yours and only yours. We are too busy just trying to survive the worst loss of our lives. We are trying to get our feet back underneath us.

ADOPTION ATTORNEYS

April 22, 2007

This will be triggering for those in adoption especially those living adoption. This came to me via an email that I do have permission to publish here. I have also been told that this attorney who testified in Allison Quets case. This is the attorney who was known in the Rashad Head case that you can read about in the November archives of this blog. Allison Quets overheard this woman calling children “PRODUCT.” Yes she considers children product. She sees us as the proverbial buck for her to make no matter what the expense to those living adoption. Adoptive parents, you need to realize this too. They consider the child that you are hoping and praying to adopt as money to be made.

Here we are allowing adoption agencies and attorneys to make the laws in this country. They are doing this to our first parents. They treat human beings like we are nothing. Do you get it now? Do you really get it? Here you are pushing adoption but do you know what you are doing by promoting adoption in its current state? There is a dark side to adoption. There is no longer any way getting around it. We living adoption will no longer be silent. Gladney Adoption Center, NCFA and many others will continue to try to silence us but it won’t happen. We are growing louder and angrier. We are adoption. WE are the adoptees, the first parents and the adoptive parents. We won’t take your corruption, lies and deceipt any longer. Its time to vote honesty back into adoption. Its time to make it about children.

BIRTH MOTHER’S ACKNOWLEDGMENT OF UNDERSTANDING OF FINANCIAL MATTERS

I, the undersigned Birth Mother, hereby acknowledge that I understand and agree to the following:

1. I have not arranged to place my *unborn child for adoption with any other lawyer, adoption agency, the Department of Children & Families, or adoptive family, or received any financial assistance of any kind from another lawyer, adoption agency, intermediary, or adoptive family.

2. I can receive pregnancy-related supportive counseling services at no cost to me.

3. I understand that the Intermediary, PATRICIA L. STROWBRIDGE, ESQ., must obtain approval from the Court for all pregnancy related expenses for myself and my *unborn child for adoption that are paid by the Intermediary on behalf of prospective adoptive parent(s).

4. I must give the PATRICIA L. STROWBRIDGE, ESQ. a minimum of two (2) working days notice of an allowable financial need or a change in an allowable financial need.

5. I must give PATRICIA L. STROWBRIDGE, ESQUIRE a receipt for each and every allowable expense, or I will not receive payment for that expense.

6. If I lose a bus pass or gift card, PATRICIA L. STROWBRIDGE, ESQ. will replace it only once.

7. I will provide PATRICIA L. STROWBRIDGE, ESQ. with copies of all bills I receive within 60 days of receipt of that bill that are related to my prenatal care, hospitalization and delivery or related to the child subject to adoption’s hospitalization following birth. Any bills received that are dated more than one (1) year after the date of service will not be covered by Medicaid or any other health insurance that might be available.

8. I understand that PATRICIA L. STROWBRIDGE, ESQ. and/or the adoptive parent(s) will not be responsible for payment of any of my pregnancy-related medical or hospital bills or for the hospital bills related to the child subject to adoption which I do not give to PATRICIA L. STROWBRIDGE, ESQ. in a timely manner.

9. I will have to repay any sums paid to me or on my behalf by PATRICIA L. STROWBRIDGE, ESQ. or paid on behalf of prospective adoptive parent(s) if I decide to keep my child, challenge the Consent for Adoption after I sign it, or place the child for adoption with anyone other than the Intermediary, PATRICIA L. STROWBRIDGE, ESQ. after receiving monies from the Intermediary or paid on behalf of prospective adoptive parent(s).

__________________________________ *, Birth Mother Dated:____________________________*F:\Data\PLS,PA\ADMIN\NEW CLIENT INFO\ADOPTION\BIRTH PARENTS INTAKE PACKAGE\BM’S UNDERSTANDING OF FINANCIAL MATTERS-1 PAGE DOC.doc

ADOPTEE ACCESS AND GLADNEY ADOPTION CENTER

April 22, 2007

Okay so I went to the Texas website for the video viewing of the state representatives at work on the law that would allow 99% of adoptees access to their original birth certificate. One of the things that is really funny about all of this is that first parents do not have access to those records. Gladney is so hell bent on protecting those mothers. They even used the Baby Moses law in their testimony. Those first parents don’t even have access to them. Kinda a ironic twist on things. The closed adoption system perpetrated by Gladney Adoption Center pushes protecting those poor women but yet they don’t have access to it. Boggles the brain don’t it.

You can view this yourselves at : http://www.house.state.tx.us/committees/broadcasts.php?session=80&committeeCode=340. Now I am keeping count with all of this. There are six people opposing this.

They are:

Heidi Cox, the representative from Gladney Adoption Center of course.
Sherry Evans, an adoption attorney
Diana Friedman, an adoption attorney
Wendy Burghour
Jim Robles

Everyone else was for it. A Linda Mendoza asked why won’t these people tell us why they are against this. There was a 100 people who provided affadavits for this. Only 6 were against it. 94 were for it. Geraldine Harris, Texas state registrar, testified as neutral, but her testimony basically said that it would cost more money. Why is it that attorneys have more power with our lives than we do? Why do they get to say what is best for us without really asking us? When money has been the sole factor in our lives, money is still being allowed to affect human lives. What these legislators don’t realize is that they consider adoptees ~ product, first parents ~ producers, and adoptive parents ~ gullible consumers. All the while they are the ones pocketing the money. They keep the negative in adoption. If adoption is so great why must it be kept in secret as one of those testifying said? Why indeed? I believe along with millions of others know why. It is to keep the tactics, terminology that they use behind our backs, coercion, lies, and corruption secret. Its has nothing to do with mothers, children, or even abortion.

One state representative asked if this was prospective or retrospective. Bill Betzen replied that it would be retrospective. This same person asked if the birth certificate was different and whether or not first parents have access to it. It supposedly has all the same information except that it says that it is a record of birth with the adoptive parents names. I liked that Katie Perkins, a social worker, stated that judges don’t find medical reasons as reasons for just cause to open the records. Linda Mendoza will forever stick in my mind. She stated that the amended birth certificate is a state lie. She also stated that the closed adoption system continues to bring shame to the adoptee and his extended family. It discriminates against adult adoptees. I also praise her for asking why only a few of the representatives showed up for the committee meeting when adoptees and their extended families waited hours for them.

When the statistics from five states prove that open records increase adoption, when are they going to listen. When the statistics from five states prove that abortion has decreased in those states, when are they going to listen?

Gladney Adoption Center along with the National Council for Adoption is about business. They are about profit. They are about getting the product (adoptees) from the producers (first parents) no matter what the cost to those living adoption. Look at the advertisement from an adoptee’s point of view. Look at all the advertisements from a first parents point of view. Then maybe you can see our point of view. When the adoptive parents spend years trying to understand what is going on with their children and the adoption agency involved won’t help them, why is the secrecy allowed to continue? Why are we allowing these agencies to continue hurting people?

Texans need to stand up and make their voices heard. We need to tell those in charge that their choice to stop adoptee access laws that they are wrong and go against everything that is Texas.

UTAH AGENCY GETS ZAPPED.

April 20, 2007

Couple who lost adopted son to biological parents files suit
By Michael N. WestleyThe Salt Lake Tribune
Article Last Updated: 04/20/2007 06:30:24 AM MDT

Posted: 6:30 AM- Facing the possibility of losing their adopted son – whom the courts returned to his biological parents – a Riverton couple is blaming the adoption agency that botched the deal. In their 3rd District Court lawsuit, Matt and Toni Worthington are seeking unspecified compensation from the adoption agency, Families for Children, its officer, Suzanne Stott, adoption attorney Les England, and notary public George Bradshaw. The child involved, Anthony, who turns 3 in July, has been in the Worthingtons’ care since October 2004, but has been ordered returned to the custody of his biological parents as soon as the court can agree on the new custody terms. Adding to the Worthingtons’ frustration, they say, is that the only tie Anthony’s biological parents have to each other is a surrogate agreement and the child’s biological father is currently in prison. The latest ruling, handed down by the Utah Supreme Court in October, has created a “situation akin to a wrongful death of their child and at a bare minimum, creat[ed] a situation of extreme emotional distress caused by the looming possibility that they may lose their son and that their son may go through the trauma of being ripped out of his home and placed with persons who have not raised him as their child,” according to the lawsuit. The Worthingtons claim Families for Children and Stott were negligent in their duties to obtain proper relinquishments and/or terminations of parental rights for Anthony’s adoption. At the core of this negligence, according to the suit, are Stott, as agent for the adoption agency, England and Bradshaw, who notarized official documents without the birth mother present – a lapse that the state’s high court ruled voided all adoptive efforts. The high court ruled that Stott’s behavior was “reckless, indifferent and in conscious disregard to the parents who place their trust in her to properly carry out adoptions,” according to the lawsuit. In addition to emotional distress, the Worthingtons are seeking damages for negligence and breach of contract, according to the lawsuit. mwestley@sltrib.com

A INTERESTING AND COMPLEX DAY

April 19, 2007

Today was interesting. I spent my early hours of work on the phones. My afternoon is where it got different. I nested with another representative. I listen to how she interacts with callers about their bills. One call will forever stick in my mind. My coworker took this call from a woman. She was requesting a payment arrangement. She was behind on her bill. She sadly was ineligible for a payment arrangement. We had to include a manager on this one. A manager took the call. Keep in mind this man knows a little history with me. He knows that I fight for open records. He knows that I wish to be reunited with my first mother. As he is speaking with her, she explains why her bill was so high. She is a FIRST MOTHER JUST REUNITED WITH HER DAUGHTER. My hand covers my mouth. Tears are pouring out of my eyes. He whips his head over at me. This woman did a very brave thing. She announced that she was a first mother to an anonymous person. Someone she does not know. He completes the call. He looks at me and says that was weird. He also says that is a sign. Stuff like that just doesn’t happen. Pretty weird yes A happy weird though. I am always thrilled by reunions. Tears are still stinging my eyes now as I write this.

If I could say one of many things to her, I would tell her the story of ambulances/sirens/fire trucks. The sirens use to send me into fits of screaming and tears. It drove my mother crazy trying to figure out why. After I spoke with a first mother from the same home, I discovered why. An ambulance took my first mother to the hospital. It was the sound that deep in my soul I always remembered. That an ambulance was the beginning of our separation. I will always remember even if we never meet in my life time.

A sad day in Texas folks. Gladney Adoption Center got its wish. The House Bill and the Senate Bill died in committee. An adoption agency was allowed to make a decision about our lives. One lone adoption agency was allowed that much power by the Texas State Legislature to govern the lives of those living, breathing adoption. Shame on them. The state legislatures better start listening to those of us living adoption than those profitting from adoption.

You want women to choose adoption. OPEN THE DAMN RECORDS.