ARE GRANDCHILDREN TO BE THROWN AWAY?

Recently I was told that I would not understand what it was like to have a daughter get pregnant. This person’s children both got pregnant. Her son’s girlfriend got pregnant. (the boy is about 20 yrs) Her daughter also got pregnant. The girl’s relationship wasn’t a very good one. It was my understanding that her boyfriend beat her up. The girl is about 18-19 yrs. The son’s child was welcomed with open arms. The girl’s child was not. They wanted her to put the child up for adoption. Is it me? Am I just sensitive to women’s issues? This person does not believe in abortion. First my comment is that the daughter is an adult. She is entitled to make her own choices. The girl eventually lost her child. I honestly feel that it was a blessing. I don’t want to see that girl become a birthmother. I don’t want her to be as angry as the rest of us in the adoption world of reunion and search. I definitely don’t want her child to come back years to be as angry as I am. I could see this person shunning that child. This person is of course no longer a friend. She made a comment that you just don’t say to any adoptee. She has gone the way of the religious right. I never ever thought she would do that. She was the most modern woman that I had ever met back in the day. Now she has flipped out completely.

Another good friend of mine said she noticed this trend. That grandparents are willing to sacrifice their granchild for the child. I have met several young pregnant girls the same age and younger even than the girl previously mentioned. I am amazed that the parents of these other girls actually support their daughters. What is so wrong about having a child and keeping it? Why isn’t parenting a supported issue with reproductive rights? Why is it that women are supposed at odds with their children? Hey Right to Lifer’s and Pro choicers guess what that type of relationship just doesn’t exist. The choices are being over exaggerated. We need to present all the choices equally and justly. Mothers do love their children and want what is best for them, not what is best for you.

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